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Topic: sad stuff (old post, new title.)
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starla*
Member # 122
Rate Member
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posted December 07, 2001 18:32
quote:
Originally posted by Erimica:
yeah, check this out.1) stuggling with eating disorder.
2) made best friend cry. [this one makes me feel the worst]
3) struggling with grades/school.
4) ...heart issues. they dont know what yet. yeah...im thinking my life has gone slightly downhill since last i checked.
Erimica, i am not trying to compete with you, but i want to look at your list and compare for a minute, because i have a point i want you to consider: 1) yes, i have been anorexic for two years, am always in hospital and its nearly killed me so many times....
2) uh huh, my best friend and i had such a big fight the other night that i cried so hard i couldn't breath and he felt so physically sick that he didn't sleep for days
3) yup school sucks. i failed. i'm over it.
4) yeah heart problems all the way, you'll find most eating disorder sufferers, esp anorexics and bulimics have heart problems. its usually one of the main reasons they die. BUT, yes i have all four of those points you mentioned, and yet i don't think my life is hard, i think life is wonderful. through being anorexic, i have been blessed with so many things, the love of my friends and family has shone through, proving to me that although i feel un-lovable and worthless, the people i love are still going to stand by me. secondly, yeah my best friend and i had the biggest fight we've ever had, but in the end he told me he loved me, and couldn't bare to live without me, and this is something that he has never openly said, and so we grew closer in this. thirdly, yeah school is tough but its no the end of the world, i failed and the reason for that is cos i am never there, but the thing is, through my sickness experiances, i have learnt so much more then i could ever learn at school. and finally, heart problems are painful, but at the same time, they are a blessing in some ways. you see whenever i have a bad day, i starve and after a few days of starving, my heart starts obviously playing up again. therefore reminding me that i need to eat if i want to live, and therefore preventing me from falling back into the starvation that was so common to me. so what i am saying, is that i know its hard, and i know so well every single thing on your list. it seemed you were saying that we might think our lives are hard, but they are nothing compared to your hardships because of those four things, but man, i have all four of those things and my life is not hard. my life is full of blessings and joy. yes there is pain, yes things will get you down, but you are the only one that can pull yourself out of this depression. look at your situation and realise that life will never give you anything you can not deal with, and every blow you've been dealt with is there for a reason. learn from your experiances and embrace what life is! now Erimica please don't think i am being unsympathetic, cos dude, i know that pain you're feeling. its a pain that only other eating disorder sufferers can share, and i feel for you. but throughout the years, i know i tended to enjoy that pain. to find comfort in the discomfort and to sink deeper within the depression. i don't know if you're doing this, but if you are, the only one that can ever pull you out of this is yourself. so please, realise that this eating disorder will only make you stronger, unless you let it kill you. and sweety, if you ever ever need to talk, please please email me. my email is DearMissSomething@hotmail.com and i assure you, i will do whatever i can to help you out, cos i do understand every part of your pain. if you ever ever need to talk, just email me, or if you have msn add me or whatever. God bless you Erimica, and i will be praying for you, i promise.
Posts: 12 | Registered: Dec 2001
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El Guapo Vandal
Member # 9
Member Rated:
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posted December 08, 2001 18:48
your right. high school wasnt stressful for me at all. i just had thoughts about killing myself all the time because nobody would associate with me cause i was differant from everyone else. the first two years were spent getting shoved around cause i was a chubby bastard, the next two, after i stopped eating, people still wouldnt talk to me, and i was "wierd" and oh yeah i failed pretty much at everything. never formed any real relationships with anyone. but your right. sever depression for about 8 years is nothing. and trust me, THAT is easier to face IN highschool than OUT of highschool, when you have MORE shit to worry about. read what i said too. i said it was LESS stressful. not that it WASNT stressful. ive still got a lot of the same stresses of highschool, but now with other fun things to deal with, like bills, money, more advanced relationships, COLLEGE, and so much more. its fun. let me tell you. so im going to ask you to kindly piss off.
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i hate you.
Posts: 232 | From: Phoenix, AZ | Registered: Oct 2001
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UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!
posted November 10, 2001 11:33
